Mother said
I was born January
because I love things
that start with hope and
then die beautifully.
My heart is the blue lick
of fire abandoned in a winter—
a woman’s sigh dressed as a flame,
a boy’s cry sewn into the throat of God.
I keep it hidden
beneath my ribs like a scandal—
each beat a matchstick
I strike against memory.
There are nights
I wear my grief like silk stockings,
run my fingers through the static
of your name,
still humming
on the pillowcase.
The saints won’t touch me now.
They smell smoke
and think sin.
But really,
it’s just the ghost of warmth
asking for a body.
I once kissed a man
who tasted like
Sunday and funeral.
He held me like
a broken vase
someone still couldn’t throw away.
I wrote poems in the
shape of his spine,
but he read them
like warnings.
Now every time
the wind opens its mouth,
I flinch.
It sounds too much like him
leaving again.
So, I talk to the knife
I don’t use.
Call her Darling and
feed her sugar.
This is my love language.
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