A MANUAL FOR LOVING ME

You have to force feed me hope if you are thinking about loving me.
Don't love me like a mother.
Mothers are leaches. Always feeding on the blood thinking that they are keeping us warm, that they are feeding us , nourishing us. Delusional and cruel at the same time.
A parasite.
A symbiotic creature in search of sympathy.
Don't love me like a father.
Fathers don't know what kindness is when it comes to their children, which is rich while offering to a stranger.
The water and the boat at the same time.
A hardened membrane.
Gravity in autumn, doing it's job anyway.
You have to nurse the nights I own and lay beds for it in your pocket, 
if you are going to love me.
Do not try to put out the fairy lights grief takes out once in a while,
if you are going to love me - instead let it have a dance in the support group of its own.
If you are going to love me, you should take vows in the morgue of letters,
that a shaky home is not at all a home.
You have to talk in stutters, not in metaphors, about the prison mates of poets that inspired art.
If you love are going to love me you have realize that I scowl over self fulfilling prophecies, and my rage carves looks like a heart.
You should be ready to displace spilled water into leaking pipes again and again, like a massacre in the brown eyes, without smile lines orbiting it.
If you are going to love me then you should treat me like a body in the midst of a pandemic and know that my anger is not an afterthought, but an example of newton's first law.
You should not dream of a story like the ones written in best sellers, but should know that a war is celebrated by starting another war.
If you are going to love me, look at me like a ratatouille moment unfolding infront of you, not as a man's glare to a kitchen door.
You should be ready to listen to a bug's definition of love and a predators act of hunger, so that you could actually understand what love really is.
If you are going to love me, you have to understand my nails are iron deficienct, but am not that weak to stand in a chair and to put a rope on my neck.
You should understand its not your fault, that it's nobody's fault,
but  only mine.

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