Do you know what apple cheeked saints

sang when you were born?-

“O the dear baby,

an angel moulded in human kiln

Moon behind his eyelids,

a lighting soft as rain”.

You, now a half man and half child,

looking at me, mimicking

our father’s words-

slut slut slut,

in vague hope that I will cry and weep.

Don’t you know that these eyes of mine,

Are my personal telescopes to see

a world I wish I could have?

Don’t you know malice and kindness

can stay in a single heart?

That was the first lesson you studied-

And what belonged to you

in the urns of breast milk;

good for you. Bad for me.

Every word saliva thick in your mouth,

You call me a heretic when I say

that all god created was divisions,

breathing our mother’s poem.

You are a prince who never tasted war

Am a slave ships against winds.

You make me a limping doll soon to be thrown out,

An adulterer’s ring,

A silver spider who doesn’t know

how to knit a clean web.

My envy is not simple, but

I keep it to myself

and suffer everything, silently screaming.

I speak in language of love letters and suicide notes

Choking on bread crumbs numbered.

You spread butter merrily,

your whims called adorable.

You read bonfires and

keeps the book mark-

my dogeared dream.

I don’t tell you that

If I could burn the roots, I would.

And only then I will give up my ghosts.

I don’t tell you anything.

Simply because I don’t trust you.

Simply because I don’t love you.

Because many a times

you have put your foot on my way

and tripped me to deadly falls-

unknowingly, unapologetically.

Rigorously executing my silence,

You call this- moving in orbits- life,

I know better-

it’s a punishment.

You think of sweet melodies,

A lotus eater crunching stars.

I try to forget sharp scissors.

Don’t you know we are not the same?

We are strangers from same womb

Our blood won’t match each other’s.

We stand alone in a pair,

trying to get rid of fatigue,

so that we can run-

you to your home,

and me to my house-  

do you know both are not same?


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